Sir Momiji
by charcol
Summary: The brave knight, Sir Momiji along with Haru the wise, Lord Yuki and a peasant by the name of Kyo embark on an epic quest to save the Princess from the clutches of Eval King Akito.
1. Brave Knight, Sir Momiji

**Brave Knight, Sir Momiji**

The brave knight, Sir Momiji along with Haru the wise, Lord Yuki and a peasant by the name of Kyo embark on an epic quest to save the Princess from the clutches of Eval King Akito.

Hope you enjoy!

And please note that I spelt Eval that way on purpose, keheh, I just like that spelling better.

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It was a fine, sunny day and all was peaceful throughout the land when…

'No way! Lady Tohru has been kidnapped?' Lord Yuki was startled at the news and immediately sat up. 'Where did you get this information from?'

'I am Haru the wise and I know all… that and the kidnapper kept boasting about it…'

'Who did it? Who committed this terrible crime?' Lord Yuki queried.

'It was none other than…dun dun duuuun! The Eval King Akito!'

Yuki gasped. 'He didn't!'

'He did,' Haru corrected.

'Well then,' Yuki said, getting up off his chair, 'We must go and find her!'

'All by ourselves Lord Yuki?'

'Of course not! We shall hire the greatest swordsman in the kingdom!' he exclaimed.

'Never fear, the brave Sir Momiji is here!'

Yuki and Haru both spun around to see the large silhouette framed by the door. Light emanated from behind him in a very clichéd kind of way. They both stood in stunned silence at the mystery figure until he walked up to them and realized…

'You're only a school kid,' Haru commented.

'I am Sir Momiji and when I heard of the terrible deed done by the Eval King Akito, I rushed here in search of your aid!'

'Well then,' said Yuki, heading towards the door, 'what are we waiting for?'

'Yeah!' shouted Momiji and ran off ahead.

Haru and Yuki exchanged glances. 'Well it's not like I could have stopped him,' he said.

_On a quest for Lady Tohru, Sir Momiji embarked  
The route to the castle not clearly marked  
Yuki and Haru coming along  
And that is how I shall begin this song  
_

'Huh? Who's singing that?' Yuki asked, as they walked through the village.

The figure tagging along behind them gasped. 'Ah! Was that inappropriate? Did you not require traveling music for this journey? Ah, gomen! Gomen nasai! Please heavens, punish me for my wrong doing!'

And with that, Ritsu ran off with Haru shrugging his shoulders.

Momiji paused and put a finger to his lips… 'But he was right, we don't know the way to Eval King Akito's castle.'

'Point well taken,' said Yuki thoughtfully and, as immersed in thought as he was, he walked right into a ceramic pot of stew that was sitting outside a house. The pot smashed which left the contents strewn across the ground. A thumping could be heard from inside the house and a second later, the door burst open.

'Oi! Look what you did to my dinner, not to mention my ceramic pot!' The irritated, orange haired resident of the house yelled.

'Well why would you leave a ceramic pot out on the street? Are you some kind of idiot?' Yuki replied.

'Why you...! It was out to cool!' Kyo yelled back. 'It's boiling hot in here, and I'm no idiot!' he added.

'Doesn't seem that way to me.' Yuki stated.

Kyo's hair bristled. 'Damn you, you stupid rat! I'm going to make you pay for that!'

'What?' Yuki asked, 'it's not my fault you're stupid.'

Kyo ran at Yuki, ready to strike…

…And a second later he was on the ground with a nice bruise ready to form.

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'Hmmm,' Haru began, 'the wise one says we should get a map.'

'Ooooooh! That's a great idea!' Sir Momiji squealed. 'Then we can find out where Eval King Akito's castle is and save Lady Tohru!'

Behind them Kyo was mumbling something incomprehensible, but Yuki was sure he had heard the word 'stupid' amongst it.

'No one told you to come along you idiotic cat,' he said clearly.

'Hey! You were the one who broke my pot! I'm not letting you off that easily; I want payback!' Kyo said, shuffling along behind the company.

'I know!' bounced Momiji, his mind still set on locating the castle. 'We can probably find a map at the scrollery!'

'Good idea, Momiji' Yuki said, taking his mind off their new companion. (_I'm no companion!_ Kyo yells at the narrator) 'Does anyone know where the scrollery is?'

Haru walked around in a little circle and eventually pointed north. 'I think it's this way.'

'Great,' said Momiji, 'so that means the scrollery is south?' He was getting used to Haru's sense on direction. 'Let's go!'

_And thus the peasant joined the group  
To seek revenge for being duped  
To the scrollery they headed  
So they could find the king they dreaded  
_

'HEY!' yelled Kyo, 'I was not duped! And what the hell is with that? Group and duped don't even rhyme!'

Yuki sighed. Momiji kept laughing at Ritsu who was now running in circles with his mandolin yelling 'Gomen nasai' to whoever would listen, and Haru was wondering why they were heading south as opposed to north.

And thus they headed for the scrollery…

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Thank you for reading: ) Any comments or constructive criticism would be very helpful, in improving my writing, or making me feel good. Kehehe

So until next time ( you never know, the trio might just appear in the next chapter! )

--- Your Editor aka. Charcol

**PS: ** Ummm, reading back on it, Yuki does seem a bit out of character at the start, my apologies, I just had to get this story started. I won't do it again, I promise!


	2. The Scrollery Staff

**The Scrollery Staff**

When she heard the large wooden door creak open, the girl in the maids outfit dusting the top scrollshelves almost toppled off the ladder in delight.

'Welcome! Welcome to the scrollery!—uh…'

The door had barely moved, but she could hear loud thumping noises from the other side…and yelling too.

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'Che, you really are weak,' Kyo sneered.

'Well I'd like to see you try,' Yuki retaliated.

'Fine then, since you're so incapable.' The peasant then ran up and did a huge flying kick to bust down the door. An 'OWWW!!!' and swollen foot later they figured he couldn't get the door open either.

'Dammit!' said Kyo, still in pain, 'you sure this is the right place, Bovine?'

'I'm positive this time,' Haru the Wise stated.

'Just like you were positive the last five times?' Yuki asked.

'Well, I'm sure I'm positive this time,' came the reply.

'And I think Haru's right too!!' bounced Momiji, his red cape flying out from behind him.

'What makes you say that, Momiji?' Yuki asked.

'Well,' said the knight, 'it has a sign just there!' and pointed.

All four of them looked over to where he was pointing and saw, above a small bed of chrysanthemums, a large neon sign with flashing lights (someone came in a time machine and put it there with some Super-Ultra-Extra Heavy duty batteries) which read:

_THE SCROLLERY_

_Please turn the handle upon entering._

You could almost hear the tumbleweed roll past at that moment, until Sir Momiji went up to the door and turned the handle. It swung open with ease on well oiled hinges to find a huge area filled with rows upon rows of shelves filled with countless numbers of scrolls, and right in front of them, a desk and young lady with spectacles and a feather duster.

'Welcome to the scrollery! My name's Mine and if I could help you in any way...'

'Guests!!' a voice interrupted. From behind some shelves, out stepped a handsome young man with spectacles perched on his nose. In his hand was a calligraphy brush and had the faint smell of coffee.

'Author Shigure! What brings you out here?' Mine asked. 'It wasn't your editor was it?'

'No no, not at all. T'was guests of course that brought me out here this fateful day. We have to make the feel at home don't we? Come, come this way! We shall have tea and biscuits! Oh my gosh, that was so poetic I think I should write that down. Shall you come forth to the office?'

'Oi!' yelled Kyo, 'we don't want friggn' tea! We want a ma--'

But he just got hit squarely in the forehead with a plank of wood that had suddenly materialized.

'A tagalong can't dictate what we do or don't do,' said Yuki without a second thought.

'Hey!! I just want you to pay me back, you stupid rodent, you think I want to come on your stupid journey?' but everyone was ignoring him.

So Haru was the one to answer Shigure's question. 'I want biscuits.'

'Yaaaaay! Sugar!' squealed the knight, temporarily forgetting that he was a knight and going hyperactive.

Yuki sighed, 'I wouldn't mind tea but can we make it wheat biscuits or something?'

The author lead them in and out of a maze of scrollshelves until they realized that they could hear voices from around the corner.

'I say, we need to overhaul this place, put some new drapes up,' said one flamboyant voice. 'We should hire some contractors.'

Another voice let out a weary sigh. 'What for now?'

One could almost imagine the look on the first voice's face. 'What for? I thought you were more intelligent than that! To do our contracting of course.'

Momiji could keep it in no longer, wanting more sugar so badly, he ran past them and around the corner yelling at the top of his lungs, 'Kyaaaaaaaa!!!! Sugarsugarsugar sugarsugarsugar sugarsugarsugar sugarsugarsugar!'

Yuki shut his eyes trying to prevent the oncoming headache. Needless to say, it didn't work. 'Calm down Momiji, you haven't even had any sugar yet.'

Kyo piped in, 'You don't plan on giving him more sugar do you?'

'Of course not, that would be stupid,' he replied dully.

'Stupid like your FACE!'

'What kind of comeback is that? You really are the fool.'

'Where's my biscuit?' Haru had rounded the corner.

They had entered a cleared, carpeted area that had a green leather couch at one end with a coffee table in the centre and a large oak desk beyond that. The desk was littered with quills and parchment, and many ink blots were stained into the wood, results from a certain flamboyant persons extravagant hand gestures meeting the unsuspecting open inkbottle. The floor space next to the desk had scrap bits of parchment lying around what seemed to be a bin, even though it was cleaner than the surrounding area. Behind this desk was a scary, stern looking man with hair covering half his face and a quill scribbling on the paper before him. Peering over his shoulder was the long, silver haired owner of the first voice. He blinked. Momiji was running in and out of the aisles.

Shigure then appeared from around the corner. 'We have guests!'

_In the scrollery they were,  
And very hyped-up was the Sir  
Will they ever get their map?  
Or will they eternally suffer the unbearable wrath?_

Mine then appeared out of nowhere, most probably hearing all the ruckus, came to find out what was going on. 'Hush now! There'll be no excessive noise in the scrollery!'

'Aaaaaahhhhhh! Gomen!!!' and Ristu rushed outside before Mine could usher him out.

'So who are you anyway, not that I care of course,' as Kyo always reminds us when he shows the slightest interest in something.

'Well now that you ask…' Aya started, 'I am Ayame, the scroll keeper here and this is Mine, as you know who is the scrollarian.'

Mine made a little curtsy before exiting once again to guard the front desk and watch out for Ritsu.

'I am Shigure, the author of all the wonderful volumes you see on these shelves,' he indicated to the masses of shelves with an arm.

'Wow, did author 'Gure write all these? He must have a sore arm,' Momiji felt like saying, now over his sugar high and not puffed out in the least regardless that he just ran a marathon around the shelves.

'No, I did.' The last stranger spoke.

'And Ha-san is so very kind to!' Shigure beamed.

'I am the calligrapher,' he continued, ignoring the last comment.

'And that's that, now who might you young gentlemen be?' Aya asked.

'Oh oh, let me go first, me!' Momiji jumped up in the air with his hand waving. 'I am the brave knight, Sir Momiji!'

'Ah, are you now?' Shigure mused.

'Uh huh! And this is Haru the wise.'

'Yo'

'Lord Yuki'

'Hello there'

'and some peasant who keeps following us'

'I have a name you know!'

Momiji laughed, 'and that's all of us.'

'Hey, don't I get a proper introduction?!'

Yuki gave him a dull look. 'You are the one that followed us, baka, no one is asking you to come.'

'What? I will do as I damn well please, and I'm especially not taking orders from you!'

Yuki sighed. 'Do as you please, I just don't know why you're obsessed with us so much.'

'Damn…you…rodent…quit avoiding the topic. You still have to pay me back and until then I will follow you 'till we get to … wherever you're going.'

'So you admit you're following them then?' Shigure asked.

'Oh stuff it,' Kyo now obviously irritated, not like he wasn't before. 'Where the hell are we going anyway?'

Momiji answered, 'to save Princess Tohru!'

'Huh?' Kyo blinked.

'Well,' he continued, 'One day, the Eval King Akito decided to be especially eval and so he kidnapped the unsuspecting Princess Tohru and all the chrysanthemums from peoples gardens. Word spread throughout the land until it reached the ears of a brave knight who ran to the side of a noble lord and his wise advisor only to be stalked by a mere commoner as they embarked on a dire quest to save the innocent Princess Tohru!'

'Stalked!?!' Yelled Kyo, but they all ignored him.

'My my, this does sound terribly exciting. I now have ideas for my next publication. Ha-san, get the quill ready!'

'I need to get some more,' he said, getting up from his seat. 'This one broke.'

'You shan't worry 'Gure-san, you can always use _my_ quill,' Aya chimed in.

'Oh no, I couldn't do something like that. Your quills will always be too special for use.'

'No matter, I would give up a hundred of my quills just to see the creativity pour out of your head!'

'But you're so kind, Aya.'

'Anything for you, Gure.'

…

'PSYCHE!!!'

Yuki gave another of his dull looks, so tempted to hit them with the interdimensional-suddenly-appearing wood. Kyo was off sulking in the corner, annoyed at being ignored even though he should be used to it by now. Momiji was happily munching on some biscuits and Haru was lounging on the couch. Aya and Shigure were heaven knows where, and Ha'ri had just walked back in with a large roll of parchment and several quills in hand. He took the parchment and unravelled it on the table for all to see. It was a map, and on it was a large arrow pointing to the scrollery reading, **_YOU ARE HERE_**.

'It was the tourist information poster outside. 'Gure's always been too lazy to draw a map himself so you can have this one,' Hatori explained. 'To the north there is a large, dark forest you must pass through, but you must be wary of ruthless bandits and gypsies, or alternatively, you can pass through the valley of happy bunnies, daffodils and rainbows.

'Hmmmm, we'll go the forest way, because if we go the other way, the author will be bored out of their brains,' said Haru. _('I have brains?' thinks the author)_

'Yes, well, do what you choose, but either way you will get to The Village. Just past that is the Eval King Akito's castle.'

_So now they have directions and map,  
Our heroes set off to what's bound to be a trap  
How exactly did Hatori know,  
The precise whereabouts of the troupe's foe?_

'Dammit, come here you!! How did you get in here??' Kyo chased the apologizing Ritsu out of the scrollery.

Momiji, Yuki and Haru took their leave and bid a farewell to Mine at the front desk who was rather busy trying to console a devastated editor sobbing all over the floor, Haru taking the map. All the while Momiji intently watched a shadowy figure just underneath the neon sign acting rather suspiciously and kneeling close to the ground.

'So where to now?' Yuki asked.

Haru consulted the map. 'North, that's where the forest is.'

'And we want the valley of bunnies, so that must be right.' Yuki thought. 'Alright, let's go.'

So the group headed north, looking forward to a relaxing next leg…

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Thanks once again for reading : ) It makes me happy to think that people are actually reading what I wrote. Is there anything I didn't do as well as I could have done? If so, please tell me! Also, it's in the early hours of the morning so I don't think my editing job was as good as it could have been. I'll go over it tomorrow, but if you spot any typing/spelling/grammatical errors, please tell me.

'Till the next chapter…you think bunnies? Yeah, right. The protagonists always get themselves into trouble, the story won't be interesting otherwise, ne?

--- Your Editor aka. Charcol

**PS: **I'm so sorry it took so long to get this out. I've been busy, but I haven't forgotten. Far from it… I have plans. Mwahahhahaha…-cough, cough, hairball-


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